Monday, March 02, 2009

So much to say.

Don't think my lack of posting has anything to do with not wanting to write or having nothing to say. Just the sign of a lot of deadlines, which is great if you need money for food, but less great if you depend on your bloggers for regular content. So.

When I am not plotting how to leave my husband for Jack Bauer (not Kiefer Sutherland, mind you, JACK BAUER. WHO DOES NOT EXIST.), I am reading and thinking and reading and writing AMAZING posts in my head that somehow never make it to the screen. Seriously, they're friggin brilliant, and I should be winning awards.


Over at Schuyler's Monster, Rob posted some videos of his beautiful daughter speaking. And then he posted the followup.

For the link-averse, basically, people rushed to comment on how CLEAR Schulyer's speech is and how they could TOTALLY understand her. And the followup was about how, yeah, OK, when she says, "Good morning," you get it, but if she walked up to you and started telling you about something and you had no context and no warning, you'd be lost. And one commenter sums it up when she says:

And, though it pains me to say this, I didn't think she talked as much as a lot of neuro-typical nine-year-old girls would have in a similar situation.

Exactly. This is how I feel about D. He has made SO much progress RELATIVE TO WHO HE IS. When he sat at the counter yesterday and said, "Who wants lunch? I do!" And Mr. WG and I laughed, that was great. But we're still talking about it A DAY LATER, and at the same time, J, who is THREE, is literally reciting EVERY LINE OF DIALOGUE FROM SHREK by heart. So, yeah. D. ROCKS, for sure, but let's not belittle the issues.

And then I read this. Again, if clicking a link makes you shake with fear, the writer talks about what it is to accept that your kid has special needs and that you are STUCK in this community FOREVER. And none of us really want to be here, as much as we love each other and as great as the kids are and blah blah, at the end of the day, we JUST WANT TO GO HOME.

Acceptance SUCKS. It means letting go of so much, and there is nothing anyone can say, not another SN parent, not a friend, not my kids, not Mr. WG, nothing ANYONE can say will ever make that hurt any less.


Megamom said...

Thanks for a thought provoking post today. Do you find yourself as J does somthing, thinking that D didnt do that or took forever to do that? Im finding that somewhat with my two. My daughter grasped her hands together and was looking at them today. I found myself suddenly sad remembering that Gideon really didnt do that. Very bittersweet.

Anonymous said...

I hear you loud and clear. So very true.

Anonymous said...

Like the post. Agree.

(BTW-finally adding you to the blogroll)

Anonymous said...

More often, I have seen the spin of non-acceptance hold people down like an anvil on their feet. Soo much anxiety goes into non-acceptance.

On the other hand, the parents who are into acceptance, if even temporary, have more joy and more energy for enjoying their children.

Yep. It is not about what others say. It is about what is within you. Barbara