Tuesday, September 04, 2007

A Post About Poop

Internet, I think I forgot to tell you that I no longer have to buy size 7 (SEVEN!!!) diapers by the freaking CASE, because D. is toilet trained. Well, mostly. Which is to say, he has been going to school in underwear since the first day, and he has come home each day in the same clothes we sent him in. And we have gone all sorts of places and he has been just fine using the potty wherever we go. So, we don't really have issues with accidents.

Instead, we have issues with "on purposes." That is, you'll notice D. grunting on the sofa, and you'll say (really loudly, in the hopes that Mr. WG will hear and feel the need to step in), "D., do you have to go potty? Don't go poopy in your underwear." When you see that no help is forthcoming, you will swear under your breath, abandon the pot of organic free-range chicken soup you are lovingly preparing for your family put down the sudoku, and lead him to the bathroom. There you will stay, breathing through your mouth and saying things like, "Where is the kaki? Kaki coming out?" for upwards of twenty minutes.

And then something will happen. One of the other 17 three (So there are only FOUR? Is that IT? It totally feels like more.) children living in the house will demand your attention -- perhaps by tossing glasses at the tile floor, or by screaming that her sister is "looking at me" or some equally critical outburst, and you will go to investigate.

In that moment, D. seizes his opportunity, pulls on his underwear, and heads upstairs. You are easily distracted (Hey! Sudoku!), and you forget about the whole thing until D. reappears in the kitchen and casually says, "Are you make kaki in the underwear? Why did you DO that? NOT GOOD."

And it's right about then that you notice that you have two fives in that third row anyway.


Blu said...

Well, at least there are no accidents... though I'm sure the "on purposes" are more frustrating.

And I hate to mess up a good Sudoku game. :[

WG, sounds like you need a hand. Strike up a deal: Let Mr. WG clean up the "on purposes", if he won't help keep D. seated. :D

lisa said...

SO not looking forward to the whole potty training thing. Ugh. And I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who does an inordinate amount of Sudoku...hooked, I tell you!

Mary P Jones (MPJ) said...

Replace "sudoku" with "blogging" and "pooping in underwear" with "pooping in toilet, but not wiping self or washing hands" and you have just described our household too! ;)

Anonymous said...

Wow, I never heard of size 7 diapers, where do you get them?

WriterGrrl said...

Anon: Pampers makes size 7 premium. Target carries them, but I always ordered online, by the case.